MyDivorcePapers Blog

So what success means to you in marriage is probably the most important aspect to keeping your marriage intact. What were your expectations when you tied the knot? Did you want the white picket fence, the financial security, the children, and the luxurious vacations?

If so, things can change. Those vows, which include, “for richer or for poorer” are good ones to remember. Too often we forget the tools for a happy marriage, and why we must cope with the unexpected ups and downs in life in order to remain a strong couple. So what are some tips for a successful marriage, and what are some specific tools for a happy marriage so you can make the commitment last?

 

1. Lowered, rational expectations. Be happy with what you’ve got. According to the Huffington Post, “Being content and grateful for what you have, instead of constantly trying to live up to some unrealistic standard set by movies and romance novels, is real happiness.” In other words, nobody’s relationship is perfect. Nobody looks perfect all of the time, children have problems, husbands become angry with their wives, and wives become angry with their husbands.

The key is not to lower your standards and marry someone that you don’t love. The key is to recognize that your husband or wife may not be the perfect person for you, but they have enough wonderful attributes and you share enough common goals and interests that it’s a truly good situation.

 

2. You know you can go to your partner when something is really wrong. Maybe you are suffering from debilitating anxiety and depression and have been for some time. Or perhaps you got into credit card debt and are terrified that you’ll never pay it off. Your partner may be upset with you, or worried about you, but in the end, they will stick by you and support you. They won’t hold one mistake over your head for the rest of your life.

Why? Because they’ve accepted that you’re in imperfect human being from the get go, and realized early on that you would make mistakes or have troubles throughout life. They expect that you would do the same for you. You should never be afraid to approach your partner about something that is seriously bothering you. That’s what they are there for.

 

3. You do fun things together, alone. Family vacations are great, but every adult needs alone time. You need to build a romantic relationship and create memories that will last forever between just the two of you. If you are strapped for cash, that’s fine too. Plan a day trip down to the beach, or take a stroll around the festival. Go to a movie and leave the kids at home. Or if you have the means, plan a fun adventure overseas or cross-country. This will not only allow you to have a great time with you partner, but it will force you to have fun together, just as a couple.

According to babble.com, “A little trip, even if it’s a short one, is a great excuse to break away from your routine. Try new foods, go somewhere you’ve never been before, explore an unknown area of a city or do something on your bucket lists.”

Be creative. There are so many reasons why certain relationships do so well and others tend to fail. So think of some tools for a happy marriage, and use some of the mentioned habits to form for a happy, long lasting marriage. Think about what success means to you, and pursue it with your partner in any way possible.

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