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Suspicion Can Actually Feed AdulteryWe’ve talked before about the reasons women cheat on men in a marriage, but what about the other side of the coin? Recently, Yahoo!’s Sherry Amatenstein took aim at the nine reasons behind this action that leads so many wives to file for divorce. Among the most interesting:

  • He doesn’t feel sexy anymore.
  • He thinks he can get away with it.
  • His ego is bruised.
  • He doesn’t make your feelings a priority.
  • He stops feeling important to you.

But the one that really stood out for us was this:

You constantly accuse him of cheating.

Here’s the thing: nothing can justify infidelity in a relationship. Even when there is mistreatment and a legitimate call for divorce papers to be filed, this action doesn’t do anything to help the situation. If you commit adultery, you’re essentially incriminating yourself when your hands might otherwise be clean. That’s not to say you’re irredeemable. Far from it. Everyone is capable of redemption. They’re just not going to find it in extramarital affairs.

We’ve said that to establish the fact that nothing gives him a good excuse for cheating. Nothing. But constant suspicion and accusation does tend to speed along such transgressions, and it’s the same if it’s the woman cheating and the man accusing.

Essentially, you can create a self-fulfilling prophecy by refusing to work on the trust issues within your relationship. That’s why it’s important the two of you commit to open communication with one another, no matter how painful it may seem.

Communication is not yelling.

It’s not blaming. It’s not refusing to give your spouse the benefit of the doubt at all costs. It’s being quick to listen and slow to speak.

So if you want to avoid the divorce forms and issues such as infidelity, help yourself out by stopping unfounded accusations. If your spouse ends up cheating as a reaction to the constant suspicion, he or she is still 100 percent wrong for doing it. But it doesn’t help any relationship to be so void of trust.


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